Telling the Truth with Love

In life we have many opportunities to share the truth with someone. The “truth” can be a very sticky situation. You have to make sure that the truth you are sharing is actually the truth and not your personal opinion or judgment. Also I know many people say things like “the truth will set you free” and “tell the truth and shame the devil.” But have you ever considered how you share the truth? When sharing the truth you have to do it from a place of love. You also have to deliver the truth in the matter in which you want to receive it. I remember in the movie “Ray” Ray’s record executive told him that he had some news to share with his and didn’t want him to take it wrong. Ray Charles’ response was “well give it to me right then.” When sharing with people you have to give it to them right!

 I know it is very easy for us to sit on our high horse and want to give the person “the truth” but you must think and chose your words carefully. If you deliver the truth in a harsh and brash manner the person will not receive it. When the person doesn’t receive it, it will leave them upset and you in your feelings because they are not “listening” to you. 

For example, you may think that your friend’s spouse is being unfaithful and they should leave them. But you can’t approach a person like that. You have to remember first and foremost they are a human being with feelings. They likely love their significant other and have no desire to discuss their failures, let alone your opinions about them. It is likely that they already know the very things you are talking about but is ignoring it. The quickest way to upset a person and send them into denial is to tell them the truth they already know and refuse to believe. (Ever heard a hit dog howls?)

Thus you have to go to them by saying that you love them and care about their happiness. You see that they have not been happy and you are concerned about the treatment they are receiving from their mate. From that point they can either shut down and you say ok. Or she can open up a dialogue about your concerns and maybe get to place of understanding.  You have to stop and think if someone was to tell you this information how would you want them to do it? Would you want someone going off about your mate and listing their wrongs with a negative attitude? I will answer that for you…nope you wouldn’t and would likely snap. In this life the last thing the human ego wants is to be wrong and many times giving the “truth” without love makes a person feel wrong. If they feel wrong they will attack and defend themselves against their perceived enemy which then turns out to be you!

We must also remember when sharing the truth you have to make sure that the person is even ready to receive the truth. The best way to gage this is by prayer. God will let you know when to speak and how to speak. If you jump out without God’s guidance you might find yourself short a friend or family member. Sometimes you have to love a person into being ready to receive the truth, which will require a commitment on your part. You will have to keep being there, being supportive and patient until you find that God ordained time to share the truth. When you share the truth at the right time, with the right words from a place of love is when truth really sets someone free and shames the devil.

 Prayer to share truth: Father God, I come to you humbly asking for you to not see me but see my heart. I have some hard truths that I feel I need to share with someone. Lord if it is your will please let your Holy Spirit rule my mouth in agenda and let me give the truth from a place of love and at the proper time. Prepare the persons heart to receive my words knowing that they flow from you and love. Lord if what I am going to share isn’t the truth or should not be shared at this time make me aware and corrected me oh loving father. In Jesus name, Amen.

Spirtual Bases:

2 Timothy 2:24-25:

“And the Lord’s servant must not quarrel; instead, he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful. Those who oppose him he must gently instruct, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to knowledge of the truth.”

Gleanings from the Writings of Bahá'u'lláh CXXXII, pp. 287-289:

“If ye be aware of a certain truth, if ye possess a jewel, of which others are deprived, share it with them in a language of utmost kindliness and good-will. If it be accepted, if it fulfil its purpose, your object is attained. If any one should refuse it, leave him unto himself, and beseech God to guide him. Beware lest ye deal unkindly with him.